► Rev. Glenn Beck believes God killed Scalia so Ted Cruz could be President Print

Rev. Glenn Beck believes God killed Scalia so Ted Cruz could be President

 

During a recent (med-February 2016) airing of his daily comedy show “The Glenn Beck Program,” resident comedian and Celebrated Lunatic Rev. Glenn Beck, donned his church approved Morman garb and announced that it is his belief that God killed Justice Antonin Scalia so as to assist Sen. Ted Cruz in winning the presidency in November 2016.

 

On this particular occasion, the Rev. wasn’t at his station so he called into the comedy show to tell all of us nonbelievers that God couldn’t wait until after the 2016 election to give permit Justice Scalia to die.

 

Initially, Rev. Beck said “thank you” to God for letting Scalia die. He then told his intellectually deprived followers:

  • “After I got past the ‘thank you’ I thought ‘you’re welcome."

Rev. Beck continued with his comedy routine by giving the impression he was commenting on God’s point of view when he said:

  • “I just woke the American people up. I took them out of the game show moment and woke enough of them up to say, look at how close your liberty is to being lost. You now have lost your liberty.”
  • “You replace one guy, and you now have 5-4 decisions in the other direction.”
  • “Just with this one guy [Scalia], you've lost your liberty -- so you'd better elect somebody that's going to put somebody on (the Supreme Court) because for the next 30 years, if you don't, the Constitution as you know it... the Constitution is hanging by a thread.” 
  • “That thread has just been cut, and the only way that we survive now is if we have a true constitutionalist [Cruz].”

One thing we can all feel comfortable about is the fact that Ted Cruz will never be elected as the next President. The main reason being is that there aren’t enough intellectual dwarves who will be voting in the November 2016 election. That fact in and of itself means Teddy will forever be disqualified from ever being elected President.

 

And lastly, having Rev. Glenn Beck as one of your chief supporters and sponsors for the Presidency is like asking Lindsay Lohan to provide you with

 

For additional stories on Glenn go to the articles categorized below

  1. Bigot Award Winner = 1
  2. Bullshit Award Winner = 3
  3. Dumbo Award Winner = 1
  4. IHOP (Flip-Flop) Award Winner = 1
  5. Joseph Goebbels Truth-Teller Award Winner = 2
  6. Lunatic Award Winner = 4
  7. MoronAward Winner = 2
  8. Screwball Award Winner = 4
  9. Rodney Dangerfield Award Winner = 6
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  20. What is a Compassionate Conservative?: Dawg Opinions Art. 41
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