Alabama’s 2021 Attorney Ivory Soap Purity Rating = 98.2%

Ivory Soap advertises a purity rating of 99.44%. In the Illinois legal system, there are 14,897 attorneys practicing throughout the state. For the year 2021, the enablers for Attorney Misfits sitting on the Illinois Supreme Court handed out the following complimentary sanctions against eighty-four (84) attorneys for engaging in a variety of misconduct.

• 5 = number of suspensions
• 9 = number of reprimands
• 10 = number of disbarments
• 5 = number of licenses surrendered with discipline pending
• 29 = Total number of attorneys disciplined

This laughable finding by the Alabama Supreme Court means that Alabama has a 98.2% Ivory Soap Purity rating for 2021 is preposterous in that it indicates the near impossibility of finding a dishonest or incompetent attorney.

This would mean that if all 14,897 attorneys attended a University of Alabama Basketball Game at the Coleman Coliseum, with a seating capacity of 15,383, it’d be nearly impossible to locate the 29 unethical and/or incompetent attorneys even if they frantically waved their hands in unison.