► Chris Von Keyserling (Greenwich, CT): Today’s “Pervert” Award Winner Print
User Rating: / 0
PoorBest 

Chris Vav Keyserling (Greenwich, CT): Today’s “Pervert” Award Winner

 

Congratulations to….

 

Chris Van Keyserling (Greenwich, CT)

Today’s “Pervert” Award Winner

 

Chris Von Keyserling is a Republican politician in the upscale town of Greenwich, Connecticut where he has served as a longtime member of the Greenwich town council.

 

In mid-January 2017 Chris decided to follow in the footsteps of Donald “Trumporleone” Trump by “grabbing a woman by the genitals (pussy). However, in this instance the 71-year-old Perv (Trump is 70) was arrested for assault.

 

Per police reports, the assault occurred in December 2016 when Chris encountered a 57-year-old woman in a hallway. A brief political argument ensued in which Chris reportedly said “I love this new world, I no longer have to be politically correct.” When the woman tried to walk away, Chris allegedly reached between her legs and pinched her groin, adding to the woman that “it would be your word against mine and no one will believe you.”

 

All that remains now is to see how long it takes for Chris the Perv to cop a plea.

 

An unreliable source has indicated that after Chris is convicted or cops a plea that The Don will immediately pardon him. This would be in keeping with The Don’s opinion that “grabbing a pussy” is considered a fringe benefit for public officials or important stars like Donald “Trumporleone” Trump.

 

 

Congrats Chris; keep up the good work! We should let everyone know of your amazing record as one of Americas Least Appreciated “Perverts”; you are far too humble.