► Ann Coulter - American Heroine Print E-mail

Ann Coulter - American Heroine (aka, Ann the Man)


Annie is without a doubt one of the meekest and mild-mannered authors, news-reporters and pundits in the country. When it comes to speaking the truth about left-wing zealots who hate America and God, she stands out as the ultimate purveyor of the truth.


Annie is the gold standard for journalism when it comes to due diligence, meaning she painstakingly checks out all of the facts before she speaks. Put simply, the enablers and apologists that write for left-wing rags like the New York Times and the Washington Post, et al. should rightfully be working for Mad Magazine or the Washington Times when compared to the journalistic integrity of Annie.
In addition to being a mighty fine journalist, Annie is also very religious. In fact, one of her favorite books is Mien Kampf, I’m sorry, I mean the Bible. Can there be any doubt that Annie’s writings exemplify her faith in God and her adherence to God’s word? It would be complete folly for anyone other than a liberal God-hater to even suggest that Annie has ever knowingly broken any of God’s Ten Commandments. Let some left-wing whacko prove that Annie violated the 9th Commandment “Thou shall not bear false witness against thy neighbor” or more importantly the 10th Commandment “Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s wife.”
Annie’s gentle and humanistic manner in discussing despotic liberals is very refreshing when compared with the acidic and abusive tongue of Mother Theresa; a practicing Rosie O’Donnell Wannabee. Need I say more?
Annie was born on Dec. 8, 1961 in New York City. She described her father (an attorney for Phelps Dodge) as a union buster (on the job training for Annie so to speak). Annie graduated scum laude from Cornell in 1984. She then attended the Univ. of Michigan Law School in Ann Arbor, Michigan where she received her law degree in 1987. It’s pretty clear to me that Annie’s legal education formed the basis for her honesty, integrity and endearing charm. After all, how far do ya have to travel to find a dishonest lawyer?
During Annie’s term at the Univ. of Michigan, I lived in Toledo, Ohio, which is about 50 miles from Ann Arbor. While she was attending law school, the minimum age for drinking beer in Ohio was 19; however, it was 21 in Michigan. This age disparity caused many U of M students to flock to bars in Toledo on the weekends in order to booze-it-up. The liquor laws in Ohio required all bars to close at 2:30 p.m.
Because I believed it was highly likely that Annie did a little partying down in Toledo on the weekends, I contacted some of my friends still living there and sent them pictures of Annie. Lo and behold if ol’ Jimmy didn’t call to tell me that he remembered seeing her at Rusty’s Jazz Café on Tedrow Road in Toledo sometime in the late-eighties.
Jim said he remembered her because of the short mini-skirt she wore, her stringy blond hair, and mostly because of her oversized Adams apple. He recalled that at about 2:20 a.m. on a steamy and sultry Saturday night in August 1987, and after all the attractive girls had left Rusty’s Cafe, that our mutual friend Joey,  who was three sheets into the wind and now lives in San Francisco, remarked how attractive he found Annie. Hard to believe a feller could drink that many boilermakers (beer and a shot) to come to such an unfounded conclusion, right? Joey then hailed a cab and took Annie down to the local Big 6 motel on Airport Highway.
Jimmy said when he met up with Joey at work (the Jeep factory) the following Monday, he teased him about the matter. Joey responded by telling Jimmy that he almost went into shock when he woke up Sunday morning, rolled over and saw Annie lying beside him. According to Jimmy, the experience was a life-altering experience for ol’ Joey because it wasn’t too long after the Annie debacle that Joey moved to and now resides in the Castro District in San Francisco.


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