► U.S. Judge Avern L. Cohn of Detroit; arrogant, potty mouth Print E-mail
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U.S. Judge Avern L. Cohn of Detroit; arrogant, potty mouth

  
President Carter was duped into nominating Avern Levin Cohn to be a District Court Judge for the Eastern District of Michigan in 1979.
 
Judge Cohn is an arrogant old codger who finds it acceptable to use fowl language in the courthouse. While Cohn was being roasted in the courthouse several years ago, the building was evacuated after a steam pipe broke. There were about 200 members of the Legal Industry in attendance.
 
Angry that his party wasn’t going as he expected, Cohn demanded that someone from the U.S. Marshall’s office appear before him. Shortly thereafter, US Marshall Robert Grubbs appeared before his Royal Highness. At this time Cohn shouted obscenities at Grubbs, poked him in the chest (assault) and loudly accused him of incompetence.
 
Several days later, Marshall Grubbs sent a letter to Chief Judge Friedman that said in part: “I have never in my over 25 years of law enforcement been subject to the public tirade of abuse from a public official that I received from Judge Cohn. I was told that I was incompetent, that I did not deserve to be the U.S. Marshall and was even shoved. There is no excuse for this type of behavior to be tolerated in a professional work environment let along by a federal judge in a federal courthouse.”
 
Over the years many lawyers have complained to the Chief Judge Friedman about verbal abuses heaped upon them by the Dishonorable Avern Cohn. Friedman was also advised by Judge O’Meara that Cohn lashed at him during a judge’s meeting. When Friedman told Cohn he should apologize to O’Meara and that he planned as chief judge to enforce the court’s rules for civility and professional conduct, Cohn replied: “Oh year, what are you going to do?” In truth, Cohn was telling Friedman "to kiss his ass" because he knew he couldn't do anything to him.
 
Because Judicial Misfits in the federal judiciary are held to a much lower standard of conduct then everyone else, Cohn never received any kind of sanction for his repeated imitations of Il Duce.
 
As we speak (ca. March 2012) Cohn remains sitting on the bench in Detroit despite the fact that he is 90-years-old. The only way the good folks in Detroit will ever get rid of Cohn is when he’s removed from the federal courthouse in a “Wooden Robe.”

 

 
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