► Judge Isaac Stolzfus of Intercourse, PA; pervert, screwball, nutcase Print E-mail
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Judge Isaac Stolzfus of Intercourse, PA; pervert, screwball, nutcase

 
Isaac “The Perv” Stolzfus was unfortunately appointed as a District Judge in Intercourse, Pennsylvania since 1993. Before ascending to the bench, Isaac, who is known as “Ike,” operated a car and farm machinery hauling business.
 
FYI: Intercourse is in fact a town in Pennsylvania which is located about 70 miles east of Philly.
 
Earlier this year (2011) while attending a state paid for continuing legal education seminar, Ike the Perv was cited by Capitol Police in Harrisburg for disorderly conduct. Ike was cited for approaching women near the state Capitol and handing out acorns he had hollowed out and stuffed with condoms.”
 
Edward Myslewicz, spokesman for the Dept of General Services said, “An individual was handing out acorns to some women who were offended when they discovered the contents in the acorn included a condom.” (Tom Murse, Lancaster Intelligencer-Journal)
 
In his initial interview by police, Ike lied in denying he handed out the acorns, but quickly changed his story after he realized the police knew he was lying since his “lips were moving.” Ike the Coward then asked the police officer if he could just plead guilty to the criminal citation and thereby not have the Judicial Conduct Board involved.
 
It is unknown whether Ike the Perv received any certification for his loaded Acorns from Peanut & Tree Nut Processors Assn located in Alexandria, Virginia.
 
An unreliable source did indicate that Ike approached Rep. Anthony “The Wean” Weiner in an effort to see if he would testify as a character witness for him before the Conduct Board. 
 
As we speak (ca. June 2011) Ike the Perv remains on the bench while continuing to collect an undeserved salary of $82,303 ($1,600 a week).
 
Given the sorry track record of the Judicial Conduct Board in actually punishing Judicial Misfits, I suspect that Ike the Perv will receive a complimentary reprimand for his misconduct. 

 

 
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