► U.S. Sen. Richard Shelby (AL): Today’s “Ass-Kisser” Award Winner Print E-mail
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U.S. Sen. Richard Shelby (AL): Today’s “Ass-Kisser” Award Winner


Congratulations to….


U.S. Sen. Richard Shelby (AL) 

Today’s “Ass-Kisser” Award Winner


Dick is yet another loser lawyer that learned early on after graduating from law school just how difficult it would be to earn a dishonest living practicing law. Therefore, Dick opted to go into the second most ethical profession (used car salesman No. 1), politics.


It should be noted that Dick has had his significant snout firmly implanted in the public trough for the past fifty-three years (1963 to 2016). If it wasn’t for a government check, Dick would likely be working as a greeter at the Walmart store in Birmingham, Alabama.


Shortly after Donald “Trumporleone” Trump announced his nomination of Sen. Jefferson Beauregard Sessions of Alabama to be the next U.S. Attorney General, Dick decided to praise The Don’s decision. Towards that end, Dick laughingly said:

  • “Not only would Jeff bring integrity and immense expertise to the role of Attorney General due to his decades of experience in the legal field and an impressive tenure on the Senate Judiciary Committee, but Jeff has also gained the deep respect of his Senate colleagues for his commitment to upholding the rule of law.” Shelby said.
  • “My wife Annette and I are proud of Jeff’s accomplishments and wish him and his wife Mary the very best during this exciting transition.”

This is the same Sessions that was denied a U.S. judgeship in 1986 by a Republican Judiciary Committee because he was proven to be a dyed-in-the-wool bigot. If Dick was truly interested in telling the truth, he would have said:

  • “Not only will Jeff bring shame and immense bigotry to the role of Attorney General due to his decades of personally exhibiting disdain for African-Americans and other minorities.”
  • “My wife Annette and I are proud of Beauregard’s accomplishments as a racist and wish him well in promoting an agenda that will take us back to the good old days of the Confederacy.”

Hopefully, Beauregard reimbursed Dick for the costs he incurred in purchasing a pair of Industrial Strength Knee Pads so that he could properly genuflect in Beauregard’s honor.



Congrats Dick; keep up the good work! We should let everyone know of your amazing record as one of Americas Least Appreciated “Ass-Kissers”; you are far too humble.


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